Author: Anonymous, stock image to protect identity
Date: 5/12/2016
I’m
a 36-year-old- who is happily married and a father to a beautiful boy
and a girl. I was raised by a single mom and when I was 22, I decided to
find my father. After hating him my whole life, I showed up at his
doorstep one day. I said my peace, which was years of pent up anger and
heartache of a little broken hearted boy and he didn’t even interrupt.
He then thanked me for coming and for being so candid, and he calmly
asked if I wanted to hear his ‘truth’. He chose to show me paperwork and
pictures. He sent me home with bundles telling me to take my time and
that his door was always open to talk.
In the bundles, I learned
of the fight, the pain, and the pure hell my DAD went through trying to
be a part of my life. Equally maddening, I learned of the evil that my
mother was. I read poems and his journal which helped form an instant
bond between us because HE was the one there for me all along, the one
who really cared about me. He lost his whole life. My mother did
everything she could to destroy his reputation, his life, and to keep
him from me; solely because “she didn’t like him anymore” and surely a
lot of jealousy.
Keeping me from a good dad. All the sleepless
nights I had wondering what I did wrong or wondering what kind of
dangerous freak helped to conceive me. And, I wondered if I held the
same horrible fate. She told me so many lies over the years making me
hate him more and more and making me pity her and feel like I had to
comfort her for being a poor single parent. And I show up at this
stranger’s doorstep one day cussing him out, like he hadn’t been beat
and battered enough. And NOT once did he say an ill word about my mom. I
can’t imagine if I hadn’t worked up the guts to go to his door that
day. I never would have known the great man I am privileged to call dad.
My dad passed away last year. I only had 13 years with him but HE has
made me the man and father I am today. My only regret now, is not
knocking on his door sooner and ending his pain sooner. To all of the
“kids” wondering, don’t wait. Go find your answers now. To mothers and
fathers fighting to be a part of your kid’s life, you are all heroes in
my book.
